Evening Personalities Take Aim At Trump's Latest 'Gold Card' Visa Program

Late-night's leading hosts spent the broadcast criticizing former President Donald Trump's recently unveiled visa program, dubbed the "golden visa," characterizing it as a clear cash-for-residency system for the affluent.

The Late Show's Pointed Analysis

Opening his broadcast, Stephen Colbert delivered a mock Christmas jingle directed at the president. "He's compiling a list, checking it twice, before handing that list to the agents at ICE," he crooned. "Donald Trump ... destroys everything he touches."

Colbert's target was the controversial initiative that permits foreign citizens to purchase U.S. legal status for an investment of one million dollars, with a "top-tier" option for 5 million. An official page promises processing "with unprecedented speed."

"A quick thought here to rich immigrants: before you fork over the cash, what about Canada?" Colbert remarked.

He explained that the scheme is also designed to "get cash" from firms wanting to hire skilled workers, requiring large payments. "That is a lot of fees, however if you enroll, you additionally get a complimentary stay at a property of your choosing – as long as it's the that one hotel," he continued.

"The best vetting the U.S. government has before done," said Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "a $15,000 vetting to verify these people completely meet the standard to be in America."

"That's important, you gotta prove you're fit to be an American," Colbert deadpanned. "The initial query: how many hamburgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?"

Jimmy Kimmel's Humorous Commentary

On his own program, Jimmy Kimmel labeled the initiative the "Get Into America Express Card."

"Here's a card that will permit affluent overseas citizens to live here," he said. "In exchange for a million dollars, you get legal resident status, you get a road to citizenship, and a president's pardon for one serious crime of your selection."

"Perhaps it's time to change that inscription on the Statue of Liberty – forget about your poor masses. Pay a million bucks, you're in!" he remarked.

Kimmel teased the brevity of the form, saying it is "harder to start a Wordle account." He remarked that Trump "sees citizenship is something you can sell, like a timeshare."

"That's right, the finest people are the rich people," Kimmel said. "It's what Jesus constantly said! It's in the Bible. He says it's simpler for a camel to go through the eye of a needle provided that you offer the needle a million dollars."

Seth Meyers on Economic Issues

Meanwhile, Seth Meyers focused on Trump's declining poll ratings during financial concerns. "The public gave Donald Trump a another term because they were mad about the economy," he said.

This week, in a attempt to address cost of living, Trump held a briefing in front of a selection of grocery items, where he reacted peculiarly to boxes of cereal.

"Lovely packaging, I think I'm going to take some of them back to my cottage and have a lot of fun," Trump remarked. "Like the Cheerios, I haven't seen Cheerios in a ages."

"He is so incredibly weird," Meyers reacted. "What do you mean, you're going to take them home to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What exactly happens with those Cheerios?"

Meyers wrapped up by mocking conservative media coverage of Trump's economic performance. "Perhaps instead of complaining, you should give him a shiny trophy similar to the one FIFA did," he remarked.